It's not you, it's me?

I'm writing today not only my own personal experience and feelings, but from the stories and understandings of my many male friends, who often consider me just one of the guys. (I still haven't decided if that is a good or bad thing)

There is a common occurrence in dating many women, and sometimes men, do not understand. The lack of understanding adds to the cluelessness of what really causes men to "tick" and leads them into the circumstances of such occurrences. I hear about it repetitively from male-types I associate with. Such occurrences are very common in the movies too, but I rarely can say, as a female, I am often the perpetrator. I know you are wondering what this occurrence is and here is the really tough part to explain (partly because many of my readers are men and God bless you guys). Well, here goes nothing...

There is the situation where everything is going fine or status quo in a relationship. Then, for no particular reason, you wake up one day and realize I'm done. I am ready to pull out of this relationship. There is not an explainable reason. There is nothing wrong with the other party involved, no problems between the two of you. You just hit the point that you are finished with the relationship.

People have this need for justification, an exact reason. Some times life is not that simple, especially relationships. You can love a person, but not have that drive to keep things going. Relationships in my mind are draining (friendships, dating, family, etc.). I think one is sub-consciencely aware of a drain or lack of spark before one's self can fully interpret and justify an ending or change. I believe some people are just more willing to act on the sub-conscience edginess in a relationship and make the change without that one infamous reason, or last straw. And in these situations, no answer is ever really going to put one at peace. When it is over, it is over. When a change needs to be made, make it. Prolonging the inevitable is a guilty self-torture which is totally unnecessary.

Guilt: Being responsible for and accountable for an offense or (in my words) a torture device abused by modern society